Monday, February 13, 2012
Mr. Bricks: A Heavy Metal Murder Musical (2011)
It's pretty ambitious, setting out and making a film (of any kind). Making a horror and metal musical, well that takes giganto-sized cajones. While Mr. Bricks seeks to combine two of my favorite things, it doesn't do either one well. At all. Only watch this if you want to torture someone into revealing the whereabouts of a stash of plutonium that Libyans are hiding.
Meet Mr. Bricks. He's a buff, nipple pierced, and full head tattooed muscle bound thug. After being shot in the head by an unknown assailant, he wakes up in a warehouse to find his love, a hooker, gone from the locale of their secret rendezvous. In his anger and heavy metal fueled diatribe, it appears a group of police officers have conspired to take his love and well, I'm not entirely sure what else exactly. The sound is so bad on the screener copy I received, half of the dialogue during the film as well as the words screamed during the musical numbers were completely unintelligible.
Shitty screener copy notwithstanding, there just isn't much of a story here as Bricks stomps around town, looking for the crooked cops and smashing bricks in people's faces. CGI gore is preferred over practical effects and it just adds to the cheapness of the entire thing. And the actual musical numbers, EGADS! It's pain-by-numbers, 2nd rate Hardcore. The only semi-interesting number is the crooked cop who does his best Damaged-era Henry Rollins impersonation. But when Mr. Brick's love kicks in with her own number, my god is it the most unintentionally(?) hilarious thing you've ever heard. It's dying cat awful.
It feels like this was something thrown together with the sheer hope of the concept alone being enough to get people to want check it out. I mean hell, who DOESN'T want to see a heavy metal horror musical? There is just no care at all paid to the story, characters and the one thing it should AT LEAST get right: the music. No doubt the filmmakers may be genuine fans of both artistic genres. But my god if this isn't one of the most terribly executed ideas I've ever come across.
Congratulations Mr. Bricks, you've gained early entry into 'My worst of' 2012 list.
P.S. I don't know how Lemmy sat through this. Give him a medal.
'You Must See This Film.' - Lemmy, Motorhead
Cortez the Killer