Saturday, December 17, 2011
Chillerama is an anthology horror film and despite the level of talent associated with it, it's pretty mediocre. And it contains one of the worst anthology segments I've ever seen.
Our wrap around story involves the projectionist at a local drive-in theater who decides to dig up the rotting corpse of his ex-wife. He does so and before he can defile the body, she bites down on his no-no area and his groin begins to bleed profusely. This can't be good. He has to work in an hour!
Showing up at work, we learn that it's the last night of business for this beloved local spot. Despite his bleeding and some strange ooze coming out of his man region, he fires up the projector. On with the show!
Our first story involves a man who has some bedroom performance issues. His good doctor, gives him an experimental serum that's supposed to increase mail hormone production. But instead of doing just that, anytime he sees a woman and is arosed, his man parts go all haywire and a single, mutated, large teeth sporting super sperm grows and needs to be subsequently 'released.' After properly disposing of one of the mutated sperm, he has no luck with the second and it goes on a rampage through town. Some OK b-movie goodness here (Eric Roberts popping up in a brief cameo) with a jizz soaked ending to boot. Not great, just kinda 'meh.'
*Full disclosure before I get into the 2nd segment. I fucking loathe musicals. Like I'd rather jam a 12 inch. dildo into my ear hole than sit through one.*
The 2nd story involves a teenage boy who's a well regarded student athlete and who also happens to be harboring a secret: he's gay. While out on a school retreat, he comes into contact with a biker gang of gay werewolves. They bite him, he becomes one, and endless upon endless musical numbers that are grating and totally unfunny are performed. As a matter of fact, the whole of this segment isn't funny or entertaining in the slightest. It was enough to take me out of the experience and make me wish this thing was over already. It was that bad.
The film limps onward to the next segment, the best of them all (this really should have been released as a short film). Adam Green's segment, The Diary of Anne Frankenstein is a hoot, hilarious from start to finish. Hitler finds Anne Frankenstein's memoirs which contain the experiments of her grandfather. Hitler uses them to create a super soldier but instead, he unwittingly builds a super Jew! Hilarity ensues during a final standoff.
The film concludes with the wrap around segment. The projectionist's ooze infects the patrons and they all become sex crazed zombies. Some decent gore here but this too drags on and after about the 3rd or 4th zombie rape scene, it just became too much. Chillerama is a decent enough idea but overall, just really terrible execution.
Cortez the Killer