Saturday, October 27, 2007

Hiruko The Goblin (1990)

Fear 0/5
Gore 2/5
Entertainment 2.5/5
Creepiness 1/5
Nightmares 0/5

Goofball homage to cheesy B movie horror from the director of Tetsuo: The Iron Man. Sort of a Japanese version of Dead Alive or Evil Dead with a smattering of Carpenter's version of The Thing, but with much less tongue in cheek gore. Strangely enough, however, there is about the same amount of cheap claymation.

The DVD seems to take itself a little too seriously as one of the added featurettes is about how the "goblin" was created. I wasn't impressed to begin with and after learning that actual robotics and thought was put into creating the "goblin", I was more saddened by the waste of resources (and money).

The storyline is paper thin and never makes any sense at all. An archaeologist unearths some ancient burial mound with releases a goblin. Another archaeologist teams up with a really skinny kid and they then fight the goblin (and dozens more that later arrive) with an array of homemade weapons constructed out of pots and pans and drill bits. Oh, and the kid keeps having people's faces burn into his skin for some reason. And the goblins look like spiders with giant blue human heads. And, as previously mentioned, they are often clay-i-mated. Which is silly.

But then, the whole thing is silly since it's obviously a comedy. Early on there is some promising arterial spray as heads are lopped off one after the other, but this doesn't last long once the spider-head goblins make their appearance. The joke doesn't last long either and towards the end the film can't seem to decide it if wants to be touching, silly, cheesy or scary. In the end it's really none of the above.

And just what is a goblin anyway?

-Complaint Dept

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